Reality Check

Ten and half months ago I started this blog and set out to have the healthiest year of my life. I was motivated. I was excited. I was committed. And then… well then instead of taking over my life and making it healthier, I let my life take over and here I sit – 15 pounds heavier and actually unhealthier than I was 10 months ago.

I started this blog for a couple of reasons. First, I needed to make a change and I thought a blog would hold me accountable to that change. I also wanted to write on a regular basis again. I missed it and wanted the creative outlet it would provide. So what the heck happened?

I made excuses. My biggest excuse was stress. I convinced myself that I wasn’t eating better because I was stressed. I wasn’t exercising because I was too stressed about work and didn’t have time. I kept saying I would start next week or after I finished this project or that one.

I actually did start going to a weekly Zumba class, just a few weeks before I knew I was having foot surgery and wouldn’t have to continue for long. I am great at doing things so I can get the credit without really having to follow through.

I won’t say that I have been lying to myself, but I have been telling myself a really good story that was more enchanting than reality. You see the difference, right?

So what next? Do I give up blogging? Do I rename it? I don’t have the answer yet, but here are a few things that I know.

•  I want to write and a few folks have told me that they want to read it.
• Until I am ready to work on my sleep habits, no other changes will give me the change I need.
• While the healthiest year of my life is a great goal, it is overwhelming and I ought to just start with making one healthier decision each day.
• I have a lot of other stuff that would be fun to write about. I am the single mother of a three year old for goodness sake and six days out of the week I have absolutely no idea what I am doing. That should make for some good posts.

I am not sure where this leaves me but maybe my next post will start me in the right direction. Regardless, I’M BACK!!! Unfortunately as big and unhealthy as ever.